26 Responses to “The Golden Years Of Television: To Catch A Predator”

  1. PWG said

    I suppose I’m glad the child molesters of the world got no game.

    Friday question: why are there no hot male prostitutes? That one dude they kept featuring at whatever the Mustang Ranch is called now was just sad. Sad. I wouldn’t have had sex with him if he paid ME, no way no how would anyone crack open the checkbook for it to go the other way.

    I’m not personally looking for a male hooker, I’m just saying there should be better options than that one creepazoid in Vegas and potential serial killers on Craigslist.

    • PWG said

      And before you tell me that the option is called “walking into any bar in America on a Friday night” let me point out that prostitutes offer many, many benefits over some random hookup. A professional would be regularly checked for STDs. They would likely be good at their job. You (not you personally, “you” in the abstract) could expend no effort whatsoever pleasing them in return, if you were so inclined. The list goes on, I’m just saying there’s a gap in this area of American commerce.

    • PWG said

      I had to look up that one dude’s story and link it here: This is Markus.

      And here’s a golden quote: “After hiring Markus, the Davises cut him off from speaking with reporters after his first two interviews, in which he compared himself with Rosa Parks and Mahatma Gandhi.”

    • kt said

      I bet if you got a male escort you could get down with them… or possibly even a stripper. Escorts would probably be a better bet.

  2. tgilaura said

    and now i’m crying at work. ahahahahhaha. Durrrr

  3. PWG said

    Lovermangenuis is the best. There does seem to be a disconnect between the skills he has, and the ones he thinks he has. What are the odds he also has misspelled tattoos?

    changeforthebetter2006 leaves me speechless. I want to know what his smooth lines were, or if he just posted the cockatoo picture and waited for the kids to pour in.

    I need to go home and tell my children they can never go on the internet ever never ever never.

  4. Amy D said

    I love how you mixed Twilight and child molestation, because really what is a 110 yr old man lusting after a high school student. Besides Hef…

    And since we’re all friends here and don’t knock each other down (unless it’s Feb 8th), was I the only one who thought that the pixels were a tad large for an Asian man? Just sayin’

    The ice cream thing made me think of magic shell topping and I’m thankful that none of the pervs touched on choco-cocks. Now I can feel free to try that out this weekend. With an adult of course.

    • PWG said

      When I searched for “male prostitute” the first advertisements that came up on the side were pictures of Robert Pattinson. Ouch, Google, that’s a little harsh.

  5. Amy D said

    Question for Friday – why is the courtesy flush not commonly used in public restrooms?? Do you feel men utilize this more than women do?

  6. kt said

    Chris Hansen jokes will never cease to be funny to me. My bff’s boyfriend is 3 years younger than her and for years we made Chris Hanson and Mrs. Robinson jokes to her face. We love each other… truly.

    Also, the lack of game these child molesters have really highlight why they are child molesters in the first place.

  7. I had to take a break after I MUST GO SHOPPING to compose myself.

    I don’t really have anything to add since I’m pretty spent from laughing, so instead I’ll just leave you with this Valentine I made you.

    • PWG said

      Oh my God, you seriously classed that pickup line right the fuck UP. On that card, with that graphic, it seems perfectly reasonable and not at all child-molesty. I’m sending it to my husband for Valentine’s Day right now.

  8. I feel like maybe icetruckkiller03 and I really could have hit it off, if it weren’t for his love of molesting children. pitty.

    at the very least I could have introduced him to planet earth while high, which as everyone knows totally kicks the shit out of family guy. I mean cmon..

  9. Dude… Back in your day, people were AWESOME!

    I love dark side of the moon and I love the planetarium. Perfect combo. If you threw in some cheesy puffs I would have to marry you. Again!

  10. cledbo said

    Ugh, dying! Dying of a laughter/nausea combination so powerful it’s threatening to break free from my body an annihilate the people sitting near me.

    I wish we had this show in Australia, too. A friend of mine is one of the Fuzz, and he worked for a while in the unit which does this stuff here – but none of it was filmed and no paedophiles were publicly humiliated, so I feel like we’re missing out. Also, you’re only allowed to work in that unit for 6 months before they move you out – they tend to have a high rate of wanting to murder the people they catch, which the law tends to look down on I understand.

    I also enjoy a well aimed Twilight child molester joke. What’s the difference between this lot and a vampire? These guys seem to have a better idea about contraception, for a start…

  11. FMNB formerly outed said

    Bahahahaha! Everyone’s going straight to hell for picking out their favorite pedifile.Sugar Davis had me at his soul patch and then bonus-weed in a hot tub. Oh, that’s game! And did anybody get a look at bob10282001′s fricken choppers?? I don’t fear the mess, I fear personal irreversible damage. HILARIOUS!

  12. FMNB formerly outed said

    . Ew.

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