Kristen Stewart Does Battle with Yahoo!’s Top 10
October 14, 2010
I’ve done this before, so I’m doing it again.
I am taking the top 10 trending topics on Yahoo and I’m going to do two things to them:
1. Gentle kisses.
Actually, scratch that. I will do three things to them:
1. Gentle kisses.
2. Guess why they are trending without looking up why they are actually trending
3. Explain how Kristen Stewart would defeat them in a prison yard shivving contest.
But, before I do – I just wanted to mention that this is Breast Cancer Awareness Month, which is why you may be seeing more boobs than usual. Oh man, I hope you are seeing more boobs than usual. Honestly, who is really against that? Just seeing more boobs than usual? That’s like getting a little bit more on your paycheck than usual. And money can’t buy you happiness, but boobs can and boobs you can buy with money. Anyway, Breast Cancer Awareness Month, our planet’s President Barack Obama tweeted thus…
@BarackObama: In support of Breast Cancer Awareness Month, the White House will be lit pink tonight at 6:30.
That’s nice, but I wish “lit pink” was in quotes like “lit pink” because then I would imagine it was an innuendo for getting crazy sexy drunk. What are you doing tonight, Barack? I’m just having some people over and Michelle and I are planning on getting “lit pink” all night. I think Reggie Love is going to be on the 1′s and 2′s spinning it west coast gangsta’ from 11-4 in the morning.
1. David Arquette
I like Cougartown.
Boom! What’s up now? What the fuck is up now? Like is a strong word, but it definitely isn’t “I don’t like Cougartown” and it definitely isn’t “I never want to see another episode of Cougartown again in my life”. It is more so, “I love Modern Family and I never feel like I need to switch the channel after Modern Family is over because Cougartown ain’t a bad like Outsourced is.” Her ex-husband is funny and Busy Philipps could show up on my doorstep and say, “We’re married forever” and I wouldn’t question it ever. She was cool enough for Daniel Desario on Freaks and Geeks than she is cool enough for me. Plus boobs and all.
Anyway, I know David Arquette and Courteney Cox broke up. Supposedly, he is with some new young hot chick. Fair enough. I know two things immediately about Courteney Cox – 1. her name is Courteney and not Courtney. 2. We share the same birthday except she is 19 years older than me. She is a great looking lady and I want her and Jennifer Aniston to become a lesbian couple who occasionally have boy toys and then they film that for Showtime.
Kristen Stewart wouldn’t have to do too much. His only tie to the people’s attention in this world was his wife and now that is over. Next week, will begin the slow fade into obscurity… until Scream 4 comes out and then a month after that he’ll really fade into obscurity and as with all celebrities who lose the spotlight and the affection of the public, his cells will break down and his body will eventually turn to dust and be taken out with the wind. For Kristen, this is a passive waiting game. No sweat.
2. Storm Chasers
Is Twister playing on TNT or something? I think there is a TV show called Storm Chasers, so it could be about them… which ultimately was inspired by Bill Paxton, Helen Hunt, their misfit crew featuring Phillip Seymour Hoffman, as well as evil tornado enthusiast Cary Elwes from the glorious movie Twister.
Not to sound too cynical, but I believe Kristen can wait this one out as well. There is probably a decent mortality rate in “storm chasing” if they are driving around in minivans trying to throw ping pong balls into a T-5 tornado like in the movies. I mean Cary Elwes died.
Kristen can probably wait until a towering cylinder of win that appear and disappear at undetermined time and have the power to tear buildings in half just unpredictably cuts right through this reality TV camera crew.
3. Deadliest Catch
Uhhhhh… so… Kristen… could… wait… this… one… out… too…
Isn’t this whole show about being the most dangerous job in the world outside of “bomb maker with tourettes” or “Naomi Campbell’s assistant”? I don’t think Kristen really needs to get involved here. They are running the risk on their own survival at all points in time and every time they do survive we are fed with delicious crab. Kristen can just set-up an egg timer and wait this out. Hit the snooze button until it is all over.
4. McRib
I saw an article on Yahoo entitled “Why can’t we find a McRib?” or something similar. That is what we call one of those “good” problems. Why would you want to find a McRib? I never thought people were looking for them. If a McRib is in closer proximity to you then you are slowing dying anyway. It’s like second smoke or carbon monoxide poisoning or watching Rachel Zoe Project – it is destroying you from the inside out whether you know it or not and whether you actively participate in it or not.
If Kristen Stewart eats a McRib she dies. Let’s just get that straight. Let’s get the bad news out of the way and say that if Kristen Stewart is exposed to a McRib for longer than an hour she will die. Have you ever seen Kristen Stewart? She weighs nothing. Her weight is so insignificant that you would have to get multiples of her and weigh them and then divide that by how many multiples you had to get the weight of one Kristen Stewart – you know like how you do with a penny. If I ate a McRib it would render me useless for at least the next 24 – 36 hours. But it probably wouldn’t kill me. It would certainly take years off my life, but at the same time my belly fat will absorb the McRib like the “Borg” from Star Trek and assimilate this horribleness with the rest of the horribleness that will eventually kill me later. But I would survive it. Like 85% chance I would survive eating it. Meanwhile, Kristen has none of that, so the McRib would attack her full force rendering her into a coma she would never awake from maybe two bites in.
To defeat the McRib – well, first thing first, it is not a waiting game in this one. A McRib will last forever. It will change shape and color, but the potency of the molecular evil that is in this composite commercially produced sandwich will never dissipate. Kristen will need to obliterate the McRib immediately. She will only have one chance at this. Once the two are put into the same area to begin their battle for supremacy, every second that passes that Kristen doesn’t blow up the McRib with a want blast then the McRib’s fumes will begin their course of action in toppling the mighty K-Stew. I would suggest a clothespin for her nose and sunglasses for her eyes and wearing a full bomb blast body armor out of The Hurt Locker and ramp up her want to 9000 and blast that fucker into the stratosphere.
5. 50 Cent Rhino
First off, yes.
I read about this before, a rhinoceros was shot 9 times by poachers and survived. Now wildlife people want 50 Cent to adopt it to continue to save its life and because he was shot 9 times and survived. Yes, I want this to happen. I want pictures of 50 Cent and a Rhino 50 Cent.
Kristen ain’t killing this. If anything I believe that celebrities like Kristen Stewart should begin adopting wildlife like rhinos because why not and they should peer pressure 50 Cent into buying his own rhino army. Have you seen that man’s twitter page? Besides a middle school English teacher, that man needs a rhino army stat.
Stand down, Kristen.
6. Katherine Heigl
Hopefully, this is an announcement by Katherine Heigl to start making what people in business call “good” movies. That would be cool. She has been apart of a few good movies like Knocked Up, 100 Girls, Under Siege 2: Dark Territory, My Father the Hero and all 10,000 of those day dreams of us living happily together after I saw My Father the Hero when I was 11 – just to name a few. There is a chance she could go back to making good movies again.
Do not be mistaken, Katherine Heigl is a formidable opponent. She has all the traits of a well deserving adversary – she looks good in a bikini, she … that’s really enough right there. I mean when talking about why Hank Aaron is such a great baseball player, saying he hit 755 homeruns is really all you need to say. He was great outside of that as well, but that is perfectly acceptable. I know I’m not alone on this, but Katherine Heigl is really good looking and she can do comedy, so I’m rooting for her to get back into making movies that I don’t feel shameful in seeing.
Preferably, Kristen Stewart would defeat Katherine Heigl via kissing her to death. Or at the very least, kissing her until she submits then Kristen would kiss her some more just for giggles.
7. Leonardo DiCaprio
More like DiCrapio, amirite? I bet all the boys at school called him that while DiCaprio was off finger-blasting their moms. Just a good ole’ finger-blasting. I did write “making out” first, but finger-blasting is just funnier. Also, I enjoy the fact I feel like classing up the joint, but adding the hyphen in there like I’m using the Queen’s English to type out “finger-blasting”.
I honestly was curious as to why Leo is in the news trending. It appears people are now realizing that he is going to be J. Edgar Hoover in a movie called Hoover directed by Clint Eastwood. Sounds very promising. That was announced a while ago, but I don’t expect people to stalk the IMDB page of EVERYONE like I do. Anyway, I was curious about Leo being in the news because Christopher Nolan directed Leo in Inception, which Chris Nolan directed, Nolan also directs the Batman movies, Nolan just announced that Tom Hardy who was in Inception will be in the next Batman movie… so… maybe… Leo… would… be… in… the… new… Batman… but… no.
I don’t want Kristen Stewart to destroy Leonardo DiCaprio because he is making movies I am enjoying nowadays. Well, if there is a way that if Kristen Stewart us unleashed like a Sentinel from X-Men and hunts down Leonardo DiCaprio and kills him with optic blasts and sheer metallic power and then gives Leo’s girl/swimsuit supermodel Bar Refeali an ultimatum that she is to track me down and make me the happiest man on Earth for the rest of our days together (we’re both Jewish, it could work) then she should get on killing Leo already! Outside of that, let the man live so he can continue making good movies.
As for Tom Hardy, I’m excited he is in the new Batman movie. I think he could easily be the new villain. I’m not sure who he should be, but I think he gives a full force performance in whatever role he is given. Also, he is known to physically transform himself for a role like he did in Bronson and like what he was preparing to do for Mad Max. A lot of people assume “the Riddler” will be the next villain. I am a fan of the Riddler and Tom Hardy could definitely be the Riddler (why not). There are a few ideas that I wouldn’t mind seeing in the new Batman movie (all or some would be great): Batman being chased by the police, Catwoman, Two Face dispensing his own justice.
The end of The Dark Knight has Batman starting to be the focus of the police that they need to catch him as an outlaw. That is a great theme in the comic books. He is not a loved man in Gotham. He is a marked man that is a vigilante who needs to be stopped whether or not what he is doing is right or not. He is terrorist in the purest definition of the word. I like that idea. I like that Batman is an anti-hero. Bad guys are in awe of Superman, but they fear Batman. As for Catwoman, there is no female character going into this 3rd movie. And there really hasn’t been any solid female characters in the other 2 (Maggie and Katie were peripheral at best). A strong and sexy opposition for Batman could be great. In these two past movies, Katie/Maggie could have been in love with Bruce, but not Batman. Catwoman wants Batman and not Bruce Wayne. That is interesting and would set this movie a part from the others. Thirdly, I would like to see Two Face back and that funeral at the end of The Dark Knight was a cover-up for Harvey Dent still being alive and being stuffed somewhere in Arkham, but he escapes and is now judging people with the flip of a coin and the trigger of a gun.
I’m so excited for Batman, can you tell?
8. Busch Gardens Coaster
A new roller coaster at Busch Gardens? Get all those people who are eating McRibs to jump on the coaster at once and pretty sure that would kill that thing forever. Easy peasy.
Or Kristen Stewart could get a monkey wrench and take that bitch apart. I heard she used to play with erectorsets when she was a kid, I’m sure that knowledge will transfer. What? You doubt Kristen Stewart’s engineering skills? And you call yourself fans. Pffftttt…
9. Alien Prequel
Why the fuck not? Some people may think that an Alien prequel would be bad because it could hurt the franchise’s integrity. Those people didn’t see Alien 3 or Alien Ressurection. Those movies were not good. Good directors and good actors and still bad movies. Crazy, right? It is a lot harder to make a good movie than people think I suppose. Plus those Alien vs. Predator movies didn’t help anything or anybody. But they should try again with a good director and good actors. The alien from Alien is one of the more memorable creations in cinematic history, so why not go for it.
Supposedly, Natalie Portman is in talks for the movie. I guess to play a younger Sigourney Weaver/Ripley. Makes sense. Natalie is gorgeous, great actress, and she looks good bald. Like really good bald. Like so really good, I should be saying great. Anyway, I’m a fan of Natalie as mentioned yesterday, so I’m all for it. The more movies with Natalie Portman the better. I have rarely heard a rumor of her being in a movie where I wasn’t completely for it. Pride and Prejudice and Zombies – fucking for it! Supposedly, that movie might not happen anymore, but that movie would have been good with Natalie Portman in it.
As for Kristen and Portman doing battle, see item #6 with Katherine Heigl. Kissing contest to the death. I don’t think either would lose. It would just go on forever warming the spirit of humanity and serving as an endless light we should all strive for when creating policy in this great democracy of ours ala John F. Kennedy’s “eternal flame”.
Seriously, how many other blogs have the courage out there to compare two girls kissing to the presidential memorial gravesite in Washington D.C. of our 35th President?
Answer: not enough
Also, Natalie and I would work. I’m Jewish, funny, kind-hearted, and she has terrible taste in men.
10. Matt Damon
Matt Damon needs to be stopped!
Not really. He’s ok in my books. He makes good movies and bad movies and doesn’t seem to be a prick about it. I think he would honestly like that assessment of him. Also, I’m glad he is giving up on the Bourne franchise. The Bourne Ultimatum is the best that movie is going to get. There is no need to keep going with it just because. Let someone else take the it and run it into the ground. Identity was good, Supremacy was a let down and Ultimatum rocked. That is good enough. You can make other movies.
I would like to see him make a comedy that does not have Steven Soderbergh as the director or some Soderbergh disciple. There are a few directors that I think could really use Damon well in a comedy – namely Judd Apatow or Adam McKay. I also wouldn’t mind seeing Ben Affleck and him reteaming for a comedy that maybe they write. It could be semi-autobiographical – it could be about two famous actors who are adversaries or become adversaries.
As for Kristen Stewart defeating Matt Damon? Well, he has had a lot of training for all these action movies, but really *hand job motion* come on – they’re actors, how tough could they be? If she could lure Matt Damon with her lip biting and sexy stare to a room that locks from the outside and once she locks him inside that room she starts a screening for Matt of his movie The Informant! and let’s the movie play on repeat – I’m sure he’ll have killed himself by the opening credits of the third time.
And that’s how we play the Kristen Stewart kills the Top 10 List GAME!!!!!
Questions for Friday!?!
Giving Back To The Bitches That First Made Me, IMDB.com
November 12, 2009
This is way too long for me to edit, plus it is my lunch time
To clarify, I started this mildly amusing website in July of the late great year 2009. I wrote a few posts and then I left it up to God to do everything else. That is more or less my strategy pertaining to everything I do in life. I’ll write it and God will advertise it. I’m not going to lie, but God has failed in many of our joint endeavors. I have written several screenplays for both movies and TV, I have written two novels, a collection of poems/streams of consciousness, and I wrote another website before this one. There might be some other stuff I’m leaving out, but either way G-O-D didn’t sell dick. Come on God! Pull some strings, do Jedi mind trick or two or eight! Saw VI just came out! Are you saying I couldn’t do a better job than at least one of the Saws!?!
Anyway, I wrote this site and didn’t advertise it in the least. I still don’t advertise it in the least. I’m not even sure how I would go about doing it. I just keep writing every day, that’s my focus. After about a month with no one showing up to the site, I still had only written a couple posts and was thinking about giving up. I signed on one day to see I had gone from maybe half a dozen clicks to just over a hundred. This was surprising. I checked where these people were coming from and IMDB was their jumping off point. I then felt an unimaginable need to dance like the white monkey I am for the complimentary internet peasants.
So, I decided to take a trek down memory lane and head over to Kristen Stewart’s IMDB page. This time it wasn’t to check for pictures or gifs, but to see what the people had to say. I’m not going to lie, I didn’t sit there and “read” any of the threads. I did make sure to take note of some of the thread titles and at least skim the opening post. In my effort of solidarity with the first few to read my ramblings, I will answer these threads that never asked my opinion nor were ever aware of me having one whatever matter that concerned them enough to post on a free messageboard. Again, all the bold titles are thread titles from the IMDB Kristen Stewart page that I did not make up and the long winded “funny” answers are all mine.
For the following, the buddy system is in effect. Find your buddy. Hold onto your buddy. And prepare for turbulence. Here comes the thunder:
Who wants to hold hands with me
Boom! Already done. Me and you are now buddies in the buddy system that just went into effect. Someone else will now have to be the buddy of Charlie Villanueva. He looks like an alien and his hands are perpetually sweaty, but he is a good guy. He is tall and loyal and he is on my fantasy basketball team, so take good care of him. Charlie, I’m not breaking up with you, but as far as my immediate “buddy” in the “buddy system” our ties have been severed. In the real definition of what a “buddy” is, we are now closer than ever because of this traumatic experience and now we can grow even closer in our emotional bond to each other as our physical bond has ceased. Continue to strive for perfection in the art of the buddy system for whoever your new buddy is. I know you will. You truly are a “gentle” “man”. Stay strong. I will miss you, Charlie Villanueva.
I’ll hold hands with you, whoever wrote this. Unless you’re a real creep, but I’m sure I can handle holding hands with you at least for a little bit even if you are a creep. Nelson Mandela was in prison for almost three decades, I’m sure I can handle holding your hand for at least an hour. Also, Nelson, if you’re reading this or if you were the one who wrote this thread on the IMDB Kristen Stewart message board then I will gladly hold your hand for longer than an hour. Specifically, I would like to hold your hand and Morgan Freeman’s hand while watching the new movie Invictus, which looks heart warming to say the least.
To clarify, I would like to hold Nelson Mandela’s hand as well as Morgan Freeman’s. It could be separately or at the same time. Also, I would like to hold Clint Eastwood’s hand. Matt Damon is the other main character in Invictus, I would like to hold his hand. If I had to rank my desire to hold their hands, Matt Damon would be my last choice. I’m sure he has nice hands. There is high percentage chance he has nicer hands than Nelson, Morgan and Clint. Nelson was in prison for 27 years and he is 91 years old, so there is a chance his hands are not the best. Morgan and Clint are also old. I’m sure Matt’s hands are fuller and have been taken care of much better than theirs, but as far as how meaningful it would be to me to hold his hand compared to the others would be like comparing apples and oranges. Like an orange that has starred in a couple movies I really like and have watched on several occasions versus two apples that have been in some of my favorite movies of all time and that make me want to create something even a fraction as poignant and memorable as they have and a third apple who helped change the modern world forever and whose name will continue to be synonymous for defeating tyranny. How ‘bout them apples!?!
Yes, I would hold your hand.
An important thing to note about the ‘holding hands’ incident of 2009
I didn’t do anything yet! Not to say I would try anything inappropriate if I was holding your hand, but… oh I get. You all are talking about Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson holding or not holding hands in public somewhere at sometime. Oh. Boy is my face red, right? I stick by what I said before. I’d hold all your motherfucking hands like I said. Anyway, the OP, the TS, the wildly insane first post of this thread needs to be reprinted and then analyzed like it was a newly found psalm for the biblioteca:
“I would write this on the thread that’s already 3 pages long dedicated to this subject, but it’s important to point out, and it will probably go unnoticed in that thread.”
Three pages!?! On my God! Who on Earth could possibly read three whole pages! You certainly needed to start a new thread about a topic that already had a million threads started on it to make sure your epiphany on this particular subject was read. This has nothing at all to do with you thinking your opinion matters more than the others. Not at all.
Good point, Craziest Person Ever. This completely changes my previous thoughts, which were none, on the subject of the “hand holding incident of 2009”. I could see how people could think there was an intimate relationship going on between two people if one was holding the other’s hand in public. But if the one person is linking arms with the another person and is resting their hand on the other’s while that person’s hand is too occupied by holding a hat is much different. I find it comforting to gingerly lay my hand on another person’s hand when they already have something in their hand. It has nothing to do with any relationship. It is just my natural reaction.
Zigged instead of zagged! I see, this definitely needed its own thread. You as well believe that they are in a relationship like all the people who so wrongly accused them of holding hands, but felt the need to say they weren’t “holding hands”, she just had her hand on his and that means the same as holding hands. Yes, this was important.
People will think what they want, regardless of what their body language suggests, so let’s just keep doing what we’re doing and be nice about it. Don’t start getting all mean because someone is convinced they are/aren’t together.
EBs
Since Kristen and Rob being together or not being together doesn’t affect any of our lives in the least bit, I think that is great advice for us to continue doing what we’re doing. Also, is it just me? But I think Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson are “together” because I think he put his penis in her vagina. Am I the only who thinks that? I don’t know if I’m breaking the mold here or treading on new ground here. Hand holding or no hand holding, I think they have had S-E-Z… err X. I meant sex. They’ve had it. If they haven’t had it then they should have it.
Here’s a supposed anecdote about Alex Rodriguez that almost makes me like him if it weren’t for the fact that I hate him. A little while back,it was reported by the New York Post that A-Rod was seeing one of the women from The Real Housewives of New York City. Supposedly they weren’t seeing each other. But Alex called her up and suggested that they should see each other because people are already reporting that they are. That is fucking the most brilliant logic. And I completely agree with Alex and his thought process. Even more brilliant logic would be for Alex to go sleep with some chick and or all the chicks that are about as hot as Minka Kelly since the guy standing next to you (Derek Jeter) is able to pull that.
LET US EMAIL the production companies of WTTR for status
Nope. I had to look up what this new lingo WTTR was. My guess of “Why the trident, Roger?” appeared to be incorrect. Roger! Not a trident! I didn’t mean I thought your wife was hot! I just was trying to be nice and give her a compliment. Don’t kill me with the trident!
So, Welcome to the Rileys is a Kristen Stewart movie. I’m not emailing nobody about nothing. Sorry. As far as movies that haven’t had status updates in forever, I’m concerned about two: Blood Meridian and On the Road. I think Blood Meridian should never be filmed even though it is one of my favorite books I have ever read. That book is just way too grizzly to be seen. On the Road, I’m very curious about because I believe it could be filmed. I think it should be a mini-series though. I don’t really think it lends itself too well to a “movie” set-up, but a one season television show would make a ton more sense. The book is even acclimated for television with cliff hanger endings for the chapters.
If you’re keeping track: War & Peace the series, On the Road a mini-series, Twilight space vampire laser battles on the Moon the movie.
OT: Can you guys please do me a favour?
Nope. Unless it is to hold your hand. Although I only have two hands and I may or may not have my hands already being used by a fellow poster, Nelson Mandela, Morgan Freeman, Clint Eastwood, Matt Damon and Charlie Villanueva if he is feeling nostalgic. But you can definitely rest your hand on my hand while I’m holding someone else’s hand if it is ok with them too.
After further inspection, the fav”ou”r has something to with “liking” something on the dreaded Facebook. I will not do a fav”o”r for anyone who writes it fav”ou”r. My country won that war and you should respect it. Also, even if I did like something I wouldn’t click the “likes it” button of Facebook for fear that action would erode my soul.
OT – This May Shock You
It didn’t. Trust me it wasn’t shocking. I don’t remember what the hell it was because it was so unshocking, but you can trust me it was not a shock. If anything the shock was at how unshocking what they wrote was. If that was their intention then well played mon frere. Touche. Je ne sais quoi. A la mode. Sacrebleu. Nom de guerre. Chaise lounge. Papier-mache!
The only good part of this thread was this gif which was someone’s signature:
Kristen’s true height, weight, size + measurements
Ahhhh!!!! Yes! Finally to put all these endless lies to rest! The TRUTH! Let me see it!
Do you want to know what the truth measurements of Kristen Stewart are?
She’s fucking tiny. Am I the only one seeing this? That chick is tiny. I don’t wear glasses even though I probably should, but I can see that she is tiny. She is thin, like real thin. You know what’s a good gauge of how big or small a person is, look at them. Open your eyes and take a look. Kristen Stewart is fucking tiny. Ok? Also, I’ve seen pictures of her standing next to other people. Like Nikki Reed is tiny. When she stands next to Nikki Reed she seems to be about the same size. This isn’t a Lord of the Rings optical illusion where Ian McKellan and Ian Holm are roughly the same size in real life, but in the movie Ian McKellan is one big gay wizard in comparison to a pint sized Ian Holm.
I don’t know women’s sizes well or at all, but if you gave me a size chart and told me which is the smallest I would say that is for Kristen Stewart. Why? Because I looked at her and the first thing that came to my mind outside of her wanting it was that she is tiny.
OT: how do you know if a girl is interested?
Good question. I don’t know. Outside of them straight up telling you. Even then it could be a practical joke. Not practical or much of a joke, but a practical joke regardless. I have read articles where people say if a girl does “touches your arm” or “if she plays with her hair” then she is into you. I’m not sure those are sure fire. I admitted before I would hold hands with Clint Eastwood and I don’t like Clint Eastwood like that. I mean I like him, but not like him like him. Actually, I really like Clint Eastwood so one like might not be enough. I touched on Unforgiven briefly, but there was a time in my life where I watched that movie nearly everyday. That is one of my favorite movies of all time and could watch always. That isn’t even including all the other movies he has made that I love. So I like like like like Clint Eastwood, but not in a gay way. Right?
Plus if someone touches you it doesn’t exactly mean they want your stuff in their stuff. Dawgz and I have brushed each other’s hands before. That sounds super gay. Not brush with a comb, but with our fingertips. Ugh, that sounds gayer. I just mean that sometimes if we are sitting on a couch together… It doesn’t mean anything!
A girl playing with her hair around you I’m not sure about neither. I have nervous ticks. Not like a crazy person or at least not a crazy person who should be hospitalized. And not like lice that are worried. But I see other people have nervous ticks especially when they are, get this, nervous. So I’m not sure. I also touch my hair a lot because I’m crazy scared a spider got on my head. Not that it happens often or ever to me, but I have to make sure it doesn’t happen.
A girl touching you is a good thing though. So if she is touching you then continue doing what you’re doing so more touching happens. And then maybe you can do some touching of your own. Also it is a good thing that the chick is playing with her hair because that means she has hair. Of course, if you don’t like hair then you’re probably a little bit of weirdo and if she is hanging out with you and touching you then she knows you’re a weirdo and likes you. So go for it.
OT: what are you listening to right now?
En mi coche, yo escucho a el neuvo “Them Crooked Vultures”. Es bueno.
As for right now, the depressing silence of an office where a lot of people have been “let go”, an intern talking on the phone, the hum of electricity running through my computer, the clicking of my keyboard under my typing fingers, and the sad crumbling of my youth every second I’m in this place…. awwwwwww “Aggressive Thursday” more like “Suicidal Thursday”.
For tomorrow, if you could repost any and all questions that you would like me to answer today because I did not take my advice from last week and write down the questions.
And you’re welcome IMDB,
KSWI Jordan
