Kristen Stewart Wants IT Tells You What Movies To Like – part 1

April 13, 2010

I hope that Freddie Prinze, Jr.’s agent only books auditions with people who do not watch 24 because FPJ is atrocious on it. Dawgz turned to me about 10 minutes into last night’s episode and said, “I don’t think FPJ will ever work again.” My initial reaction was “he’ll work again…. Maybe not.”  Mr. Prinze is terrible on 24. His character is a CTU agent like the Energizer bunny of death Jack Bauer (Kiefer Sutherland). This season is set in New York City, so I guess to Freddie that meant his character Cole Ortiz should have the greatest bastardization of a New York accent ever.

“Agent Bauer, the nuclear warheads are safe now, so FUGGEDABOUDIT!!!!!!!”

FUH-GED-DUH-BOUD-IT! FUH-GETS! FUH-GETS ABOUD-IT! FUH-GETS!

Not to say that CTU discriminates, but usually candidates to be international counter-terrorism agents do not have thicker accents than the cast of A Bronx Tale combined. Hey oh! Zing!

“Uh, not for nuthin’ Jack, but how ‘bout we skip the gun fight and get some PASTA FAH-ZHUL!?! Am I right? Yo, Adrienne! I mean – yo, Chloe! How ‘bouts we reposition a satellite to look in on the Bada Bing club on route 9? I mean hey yo fuggetabout it. Wherez the dance muzik at?”

FUH-GED-DUH-BOUD-IT! GA-BUH-GOOL! PRE-MAH-VAIR-RAH! FUH-GETS!

Summah time is the time for movies. Starting this weekend until the end of August, there is a nationwide movie coming out every weekend that could be worth seeing. Some of these movies may be worth seeing because they’ll actually be good. Some of these movies may be worth seeing because they’ll be so terrible it could be funny. The movie studios of the world have sunk a good deal of money into most of these movies and you’ll be drowning in advertisements for them.

I thought I would help you all tread those dangerous waters with my own previews on them. Today and tomorrow’s post will be filled with my little quips and observations, similar to what I did for the year end movies of last year. I will start with this coming weekend and I’ll end at an arbitrary date like June 30th when some vampire movie comes out. I’m sure you all don’t care about what comes after this “some vampire” movie anyway, so I’ll stop there.

April 16th

Kick-Ass

Photobucket

http://www.comingsoon.net/films.php?id=43515

Hands down my most anticipated movie this year. I am a fan of those nerdy comic books. Also, I am a fan of the director Matthew Vaughn. I have a lot of faith in Vaughn to make movies I will enjoy. He was originally Guy Ritchie’s producing partner and then Vaughn went Sarah Palin “rogue” and started directing films of his own. First up was Layer Cake which I loved. Stardust was good for what it was – it definitely could have been much worse. Vaughn was in talks to direct X-Men III and Thor. I really liked some of the ideas he mentioned in interviews he had for those movies, sadly he didn’t make them. But he did make this – Kick-Ass.

The story is pretty simple – a nerdy teenage kid gets the nerve to try his hand at being a real life superhero. His first night on the job he gets the shit kicked out of him. He kind of continues to get the shit kicked out of him for awhile until he wizens up a little. Someone cellphone videos our main character fighting some street hoodlums and puts it on the almighty YOUTUBE. This attracts some likeminded individuals and more and more people start dressing up and deciding to fight crime.

The writer, Mark Millar, is well known for his graphic violence and dark humor. Millar is also known for tearing down comic book institutions in his writing. He is the “anti-comic book” comic book writer. He attacks comic book clichés and humiliates the heroes most know and love. Vaughn has a pretty straightforward, no frills, but aggressive style. Couple that with Millar’s ultra violent and profanity ridden source material and I think this should be a very very fun ride.

Photobucket

I’m giving this 5 out of 5 Kristen Stewart wants IT throwing-up heads. And fuck all the haters of Nic Cage.

Death at a Funeral

Photobucket

http://www.comingsoon.net/films.php?id=50347

I think this looks good, real good. A lot of people in this movie do not have the best resume for films. Chris Rock has a few hits like CB-4, Dogma, Pootie Tang – but the man also has some terrible ass movies on his filmography. Sadly, same goes for Martin Lawrence, director Neil LaBute, and Tracy Morgan. Judging solely on past performances, one might think this is destined to be bad. But I have utter confidence in this movie. For awhile there, it seemed like black comedies were just being mailed in. Take a bunch of black entertainers (not even comedians, just singers and what not) and stick them in a movie with a loose storyline of them being related in some way or another. A lot of those movies do suck *cough-Tyler Perry-cough*, but some of them are hysterical like Welcome Home, Roscoe Jenkins.

Besides being chock full of those great comedians (Lawrence, Rock and Morgan), there is also Kevin Hart, Danny Glover, Peter Dinklage and Luke Wilson. Another huge factor is this movie is rated R. That means a lot. That generally means that the comedy isn’t being presented for kids and it will allow these actors to do what they want and not feel limited. The trailer is funny and I’m hoping that the movie is as well. It seems like there is enough mad cap craziness from the dead father turning out to be gay, James Marsden taking a hallucinogenic, Luke Wilson trying to win back Zoe Saldana, the duo of Glover and Morgan, Martin Lawrence being a ladies man, Chris Rock trying to keep it altogether et cetera that the movie should never get boring.

Photobucket

I give this 4 out 5 Kristen Stewart wants IT throwing up heads. My only trepidation is the director having not made a good fast paced comedy like this before. Nurse Betty and The Shape of Things are good, but not fast paced and way more dramatic.

April 23rd

The Losers

Photobucket

http://www.comingsoon.net/films.php?id=50350

Holy fuck this looks terrible! Terrible! So TERRIBLE that I’m pronouncing it TEAR-EE-BLAY! For whatever reason, 2010 is the year of Bad News Bears mercenary films. Off the top of my head, The Losers, The A-Team and The Expendables all have identical plots. Each film centers on a group of men who are all very different, but are all amazingly military trained killers. They joined together to become soldiers of fortune and whoever their boss is fucks them over. Now they are out there on their own and looking for some payback. Out of these three movies, The Losers looks by far the worst.

The movie is all clichés. Jeffrey Dean Morgan is the suave one always in a suit with 5 o’clock shadow. Idris Elba is the black guy. Chris Evans is the nerdy one with the gadgets. And the Hispanic guy is Chris Evans’ back-up. And there is another black guy in the movie, but it doesn’t look like he does much so let’s pretend like he doesn’t exist much like the editor of the trailer did. Now throw in Zoe Saldana as the hot chick who gets into a gun fight while wearing lingerie. This movie as a whole will be horrendous, but it could be fun to get drunk and see it to make fun of it.

Photobucket

I’ll give this 2 out of 5 Kristen Stewart wants IT throwing up heads. The 1 head is because Zoe Saldana is hot. The 2nd head is because I like Idris Elba and I’m glad he is getting steady employment.

April 30th

A Nightmare on Elm Street

Photobucket

http://www.comingsoon.net/films.php?id=47103

I hate horror movies. This will be quick and biased because horror movies suck. I can think of a few horror movies that are good and I would generally categorize those movies in some other genre. By and large, the horror genre is the worst genre. The WORST genre is the Asian gore genre. I would rather watch every Jennifer Anniston movie from now until… well no one is going to stop making those damn movies because they’re all the same, so until forever than watch a single second of another Asian gore film. Ichi the Killer, Audition, Suicide Club et cetera are stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Anyway, they are remaking Nightmare on Elm Street for the fuck of it and here it is.

For the first time, someone will play Freddy Kreuger besides Robert Englund. Freddy will be played by Jackie Earle Haley who is doing a tremendous job in movies recently. I will not end up seeing this movie. I really don’t care about Nightmare on Elm Street the original or this remake. I do think the Freddy character is one of the better horror creations, but I still just don’t give a fuck.

Photobucket

I’ll give this 1 out of 5 Kristen Stewart wants IT throwing up heads just because plenty of people do like horror films – just not me. Call me when the film studios pull their heads out of their asses and make the Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash sequel. That I’ll see. With bells on. Shop smart; shop S-Mart – YOU GOT THAT!

May 7th

Iron Man 2

Photobucket

http://www.comingsoon.net/films.php?id=44655

I’m excited and so is America. Iron Man was huge and sequels only get hugeR with a capital “R”. I thought the first Iron Man was remarkably like the first Spider Man. Majority of the film was an origin story, pretty meh bad guy, couple scenes of the superhero being a superhero and then a quick end with the bad guy. Iron Man had more comedy than melodrama than Spider Man which was good. I expect the sequels to play out similarly as well.

I really liked Spider Man 2 much more than the original. Spider Man 2 was a much larger film.  It had a much more in-depth villain who truly battles our hero as well as a side villain who attacks Peter Parker rather than Spider Man. Spider Man 2 had Alfred Molina as Doc Ock and Iron Man 2 has Mickey Rourke as Whiplash. Spider Man 2 had James Franco as Green Goblin 2/Harry Osborn and Iron Man 2 has Sam Rockwell as Justin Hammer. Spider Man 2 also had a real feel that Peter Parker was truly questioning what his purpose was as Spider Man and how was he doing at it. It appears that Iron Man/Tony Stark will go through a similar struggle.

Iron Man 2 has a much larger scope than the original. Besides Gwyneth Paltrow coming back, there are a slew of new characters. The love of my life, Scarlett Johannson as Black Widow, Olivia Munn as Iron Maiden, Don Cheadle as War Machine, Samuel L. Jackson as Nick Fury and then so on and so on. The problem that a lot of movies run into is having too much. Iron Man 2 might run into this problem. I have a lot of confidence in Jon Favreau as a director and I hope he can handle all these characters.

Photobucket

I’m giving this 4 out of 5 Kristen Stewart wants IT throwing up heads. My fear is they may be squeezing too many characters into one movie, but we’ll just have to wait and see. Also, there are so many hot chicks in this movie and none of them will get naked in it, which is disheartening.

May 14th

Robin Hood

Photobucket

http://www.comingsoon.net/films.php?id=20816

Simply – THIS WILL KICK ASS! If people thought Gladiator was ripping off Braveheart then people will go bananas when they see this. Robin Hood is more or less Braveheart with a focus on archery rather than Mel Gibson’s flowing hair. I’m not saying it will be anywhere near as good as Braveheart is, but expect something similar as far as rousing speeches, blue collar farmers turned sword swinging soldiers, blood, grunting, violence and over all death to the British nobles. People need to look at the movie in this regard more so than a remake of Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves. That movie is tremendous in its own right and this movie will be absolutely nothing like it.

The cast is pretty epic for the movie as well. Russell Crowe is the man and don’t let people try to convince you otherwise. Just like no matter what happens on 24, Jack Bauer always kicks ass and looks convincing when he does so – that is Russell Crowe. I don’t care if he is supposed to be a space alien or Taiwanese – Russell Crowe is going to beat someone’s ass and it will be intense. Russell is joined by tons of great actors like Cate Blanchett, Max Von Sydow, Mark Strong (need someone British who intimidates – he is your man right now), Danny Huston, William Hurt, Mark Addy and all under the guiding hand of Ridley Scott.

Photobucket

I will give this 4 out of 5 Kristen Stewart wants IT throwing up heads. There is absolutely no way this movie will not be entertaining even if this is well tread ground. I didn’t give it 5 out of 5 heads because Morgan Freeman, Alan Rickman and that wonderful song will not be in it. EVERYTHING I DOOOOO!!!!! I DOOO IT FOR YOU!!!!

Sidenote: Just Wright

http://www.comingsoon.net/films.php?id=54057

Queen Latifah, Common and Alicia Keyes have a movie coming out that same day. I will be seeing Robin Hood because it will be badass and because the trailer for Just Wright has absolutely everything that happens in the movie in it already. If you feel like knocking a movie off your 2010 list right now – watch the trailer for Just Wright because it’s the whole damn movie.

And lastly for today…

May 21st

MacGruber

Photobucket

http://www.comingsoon.net/films.php?id=57555

Um… yeah. This will be the GREATEST MOTHERFUCKING MOVIE EVER!!!!

Photobucket

YES! ALL THE HEADS OF KRISTEN STEWART WANTS IT THROWING UP!!!!!

I’ll see you tomorrow.

Advertisements

65 Responses to “Kristen Stewart Wants IT Tells You What Movies To Like – part 1”

  1. tiffanized said

    I don’t know how I feel about you not liking Audition. I don’t trust your Kristen Stewart Wants IT Throwing Up Heads system anymore after that insight into your movie taste. Except for MacGruber getting all the Kristen Stewart Wants IT Throwing Up Heads; they don’t even need to hold Sundance or the Golden Globes or the Oscars since we know MacGruber is going to sweep those bastards.

  2. Susanelle said

    Hmm, I loved Braveheart and Gladiator but I don’t know about Robin Hood. Everybody in it is so old. They’re so old I’m pronouncing it ew-lol-dee.

  3. campbelld said

    My gawd I am looking forward to Kick Ass. The comic is freaking amazing and I think some people are gonna be really freaked out by how messed up some of the stuff in it is. If it makes it into the movie, which most of it looks like it might. They do seem to have cut one story though, just to lighten things up a little.
    I’m not looking forward to Death at a Funeral. I like the original so much, it’s so understated and british and people trying to be polite at a funeral, but this seems like ‘we’re being loud and black and that’s hilarious.’
    The Losers does look awful. It’s actually another comic book movie, funnily enough.
    I like horror films, to an extent and I am looking forward to Nightmare. Looks like they’ve got some great set pieces worked out. Big Jackie Earle Hayley fan too, so it’s great to see him getting work.
    Holy Shit Iron Man 2. The first one is my favourite superhero film, except half of that is how awesome Robert Downey Jnr. is. In the comics, Tony Stark is kind of a jerk, well, most of the time, but RDJ just makes him so fucking charming at the same time. Hugely excited for this.
    Fuck yeah Robin Hood. Havent seen Rusty kickin’ arse and takin’ names for a while now, so good to see him gettin back into the groove. Have some problems with this though, becuase Robin is meant to be a young guy and this is an origin story and he’s kinda well over the young guy stage. Anyway, it’ll probably be good, just not as a Robin Hood movie.
    Yes I have seen the trailer to Macgruber. Yes it does look incredibly amazing/idiotic.

    • Lala said

      I didn’t know this Death at a Funeral was the same as the british Death at a Funeral. So I’m definitely not watchig this one, the first was really good. MacGruber will be awesome, I’m just not sure if it will ever be on the movies in Brazil. And if it is, it will take a long time. Everyone is more worried about “some vampire” movie than anything else.

    • AmyAlmost said

      Thought the same thing when I saw Death at Funeral the American version poster, nothing but fried chicken, grape ‘soda’ and watermelon jokes. I hope that I’m completely wrong in that, I love being wrong. I do love Tracy Jordan/Morgan. I found the original film painful because it reminded me of my family.

  4. Let’s forget about the movies for a second and talk about how ingenious your Freddie Prinze Jr. rant was at the beginning of this post. It had me in tears. He is atrocious. Laughable. But I still love the show regardless. I’m going to miss it next year… I’ve actually thoroughly enjoyed this season so far.

    Anyway… I agree with pretty much all of what you said that I’ve understood/seen. Like I never saw Iron Man, strangely enough, so I’m a little lost there. And I just want to see Kick-Ass because it looks entertaining – I had no idea there was a comic book involved.

    However, the black comedy remake of Death at a Funeral irks me. A lot. I love the British version of it. I do like quirky, British comedies as a whole, but I feel like a big part of what worked with that movie was the fact that they were British and meant to be all proper and whatnot. So there’s a lot of comedy in the uncomfortableness that all the revelations result in.

    • campbelld said

      There are two bits in the trailer that piss me off especially-when the mother hits Chris Rock’s wife in the face when her favourite son arrives and when Tracy Morgan tells Uncle Russell that he’s going to be in the box next. Neither or those fits with the whole idea of the film. It’s just, ugghhh, rageface!

    • Pol said

      Have you seen ‘Waking Ned’? That’s a classic.

  5. Lala said

    Oh, and I still haven’t watched Iron Man so probably I will not watch Iron Man 2. It’s not like it’s saying a lot, since I haven’t watched most of the movies one is supposed to watch. I mean, I just saw Gladiator last week.

  6. MLF said

    For the most part I completely agree with your expectations of these movies, with two exceptions. 1- I would give robin hood five kstew heads. I love movies like that and that guy was in gladiator and totally rocked it so I am thinking he will be perfect for that part…also I suspect the movie will be somewhat similiar to king arthur, which I loved. In general I think I am looking forward to that movie the most. 2- I have no idea wtf Macgruber is. Never heard of it, no idea what it’s about…but the woman’s ass on the poster looks fantastic so at least there is that.

  7. PWG said

    I’m glad you told me that was Jeffrey Dean Morgan in The Losers shot. For a second I thought it was Robert Downey Jr.’s crotch being shoved down my throat by the movie poster. (Uh, *?) I’ll probably see all three of those identical movies: The Losers, The A-Team and The Expendables. Even if they have the same plot. Even if they’re awful. Apparently I like soldier of fortune movies.

    Robin Hood? Eh, sure, why not. I like to watch Russell Crowe act because he always looks like he hates every minute of whatever he’s doing. He’s like one of those Russian circus bears: talented and forced to perform for my entertainment. Actually now my mind is wandering off to whether or not he’d be a good sex slave.

    The Iron Man poster seems to be pointing out insistently that not only is Scarlett Johannson in the movie, but SO ARE HER SPECTACULAR BREASTS.

    Big fan of Jackie Earle Haley. Love that dude. Won’t see that unnecessary remake, but I bet he kicks ass in in.

    • MLF said

      Russell Crowe would be an awful sex slave. He’s too in charge I think, at least it seems that way. I can’t picture him being submissive in the bedroom- even as a “slave” in gladiator he was totally boss.

      and oh em geeeee! I totally forgot about A Team. I SOOOOOO want to see that movie. I give it like, 36.5 Kstew heads.

      • PWG said

        At the risk of looking like I’ve thought about this too much in the last 15 minutes, it’s those very qualities that made the idea intriguing. Okay, I’ll go be creepy somewhere else now.

      • Agreed. Everyone loves a good challenge.

        And don’t you dare take your creepy somewhere else. Unless it’s to Twitter where I can still witness and participate in it.

      • tiffanized said

        The best submissives are the ones who are in total control in their nonsexual lives. Contrary to popular belief, a good working Dom/sub relationship is a pretty even power exchange–the names are more referring to the roles played by the Dominant and submissive than to the actual amount of power each has. But PWG referred to a sex slave, which is a slightly different thing than a submissive (there is overlap . . . I could Venn diagram it up, but I think you could imagine it just fine without me having to open up Photoshop). I wouldn’t want Russell Crowe as either of those things, really. But then again, I’m not a Dom.

      • Pol said

        Yes, he was way too macho throughout that whole movie.. in reality if he hadn’t been somewhat submissive as a slave they would have fed his ass to the lions.

      • PWG said

        I feel like Jordan’s biggest comment hijacker ever. Well done on those couple of thousand words, Jor-el, but we’re going to be over here discussing my deviant mental pictures instead. Don’t mind me, I’ll just be *whistling nonchalantly* thinking about having missionary sex with the lights off at home with my husband. Nothing to see here, officer.

      • MLF said

        good points, but I still just can’t picture it. I feel like if I were to tie up russell crowe in my bedroom he would simply flex his muscles and bust out of the leather straps, and them probably spank me with them. which hey, I’m no dom either so the idea is not wholly unappealing, but yeah…sex slave…I just can’t see it.

      • MLF said

        and PWG- I think Jordan is pretty used to our comment hijacking and dirty minds at this point. also I’m pretty sure he likes it, so you def. don’t need to apologize…but far more importantly like HB already pointed out, we (as in the other deranged common taters) like it and we want to hear it, staying on topic be damned.

  8. PWG said

    I haven’t seen Freddie Prinze Jr. in 24, although I believe you when you say he’s mis-cast. But is he more mis-cast there than as Fred in the Scooby Doo movie? I honestly believe he got that job just because his name was Freddie. Not even being married to Sarah Michelle Gellar could explain it. Producers: “Who could we get to play the most whitebread closeted blonde kerchief-wearing animated character ever?” Do you honestly believe Freddie Prinze Jr. popped into anyone’s head? Even as the thousandth choice?

    Also, I’m dying to see Iron Man 2. I love that movie, and I love RDJ in it, and I love Paul Bettany even if he only gets to do the JARVIS voice. They have several great actors in it, and if they eff up the script I’ll be so mad. I read somewhere that the first script was mostly improvised and Favreau just kind of let them run with it. If that’s the case, do it again.

  9. Pol said

    Agree with everything except Robin Hood…

    Egh, I don’t like Freddie Prinz Jr or Russel Crowe.
    Russel Crowe is an ok actor who gets very good movies, I think he is more lucky than talented…. he just grates me.
    I think he and Tom Hanks are only really good at playing people who are slightly stupid or mentally retarded …same goes for Tobey Maguire who is an awful Spiderman.

    I liked 300 and Titus way more than Gladiator and Braveheart.

  10. Pol said

    How hot is Scarlett Johansen as the black widow?!!!

  11. susanelle said

    I actually don’t find Scarlett Johansson very attractive *ducks and hides*

    I don’t either, Mlf. Come over here and sit by me.

    • MLF said

      *gets up from seat next to Johansson lovers and sits down next to Susanelle*

      I will share my snacks we you and I even have juice boxes. we can bond over our lack of lady wood for poor Scarlett.

      • susanelle said

        lol

        Like, she’s a billion times better-looking than me, but there’s something about her face I just find… I dunno… dolphin-like?

        Nothing against dolphins, either… they’re the cutest fish-slash-mammals in the sea, but… they don’t look good in bombshell hair and clothes, amirite?

      • MLF said

        word. you are totally right. I even see the dolphin-esque-ness.

    • PWG said

      From the neck down she looks like a fertility goddess statue. My boss has a picture of her here in our room so I’m looking at it as I type. I don’t think I’ve seen her in anything since The Horse Whisperer, so I can’t speak to her acting skills. Her husband’s cute.

    • Pol said

      *throwing popcorn at the lot of you*

    • Really? I fear God might actually smite me were I to question the perfection of Scarlett Johansson… I personally think she’s beautiful. And if she’s good enough for Ryan Reynolds, she’s good enough for me.

      • MLF said

        *squirts juicebox at Pol*

        She does have a bangin bod but that is part of what I don’t like about her. She’s too curvy for my taste, I like my women petite and small chested. also “I prefer brunettes” *shrugs* I’m pretty sure Scarlett isn’t too upset that I don’t wanna do her though, since like, millions of other people do. Also she has Ryan Reynolds so she must be pretty happy. Although, Ryan doesn’t really do it for me either.

      • campbelld said

        I would love to murder Ryan Reynolds. But then I remember that he played ‘normal Deadpool’ really well and I want him to have his own movie that disregards Wolverine, but thats cos I’m a huge nerd.

  12. SingleStrand said

    Layer Cake AND Welcome Home, Roscoe Jenkins in one post?! Did we just become best friends? (If you don’t get the StepBrothers reference, you are dead to me). I have a soft spot for cocaine movies and Mr. Strand has a soft spot for anyone that says “I’m pretty in the face and thick around the waist” so those two are staples in our house.
    PS ScarJo makes me vomit…but so does most everything these days.

    • I’m still angry at Stepbrothers for being a filthy tease. In the trailer, they included a totally hilarious clip of Will Ferrell burying John C. Reilly in the front yard and saying in this whispery voice “they’ll NEVER find you!” It was one of the main reasons I even saw the movie. Then? Not in the fucking movie! Nowhere! RAGE!

      • MLF said

        WHATTT? dude I am with you on mourning the apparent loss of the burial scene but that movie was total awesomesauce. Ok fine they cut one brilliant five minute segment but the movie was still a solid multiple hour festival of comedic genius.

      • PWG said

        I have a mental list of trailers that lie. I hate that. I’m mad that Jerry Maguire had Pete Townshend’s “Let My Love Open the Door” in the trailer but it wasn’t in the movie. Rachel McAdams losing the bottom of her dress in Sherlock Holmes, they showed that scene a million times in the trailers. Not in the movie. I know they do the trailer mock ups before the movie’s edited but it’s a pet peeve.

      • PWG said

        I do like the Shining remix, though.

      • Yes! MAJOR pet peeve. The Sherlock Holmes trailer made it look like Rachel McAdams spent at least half of her free time lazing around in corsets and feathery lingerie. Lies! Vicious, vicious falsehoods. But I wasn’t quite as angry with the filmmakers for lying to me in that case, as I was thoroughly confused by my strong desire to see Rachel McAdams half naked…

        MLF – I still think Stepbrothers is funny. But I’m angry at it. It’s like how I still laugh at Jordan’s even when he uses “butch” incorrectly.

      • SingleStrand said

        95% of StepBrothers is quotable. I know this because I watched it daily for a good 3-4 months. It was my Twilight when I wasn’t really aware of Twilight. SB brought me fancy sauce, smoked a j, and fuckin Catalina wine mixer. These are a few of my favorite things.

      • MLF said

        “I smoked pot with Johnny Hopkins.
        You dont know anyone named Johnny Hopkins. It was Johnny Hopkins, and Sloan Kettering, and they were blazin that shit up everyday”

        also- “I witnessed with my eyes your testicles touching my drum set”

        amazing.

      • Pol said

        This is why I avoid watching trailers…especially since so many are basically abridged versions of the movie so why the hell bother would I bother paying for the ticket after showing exactly me what happens!!!!!

    • Cristalena said

      i live for quotable movies! if i took movie quotes out of my vocabulary i’m pretty sure i’d be mute.

  13. Cristalena said

    i’m most excited for macgruber. anything with kristen wiig. she’s pretty sexy and pretty funny! i’d totally scissor with her.

  14. AmyAlmost said

    Robin hood is the sux. I mean you talk Kevin Costner and that song, but your forget the one and only version worth it’s salt. Walt Disney’s Robin Hood.

    Are they going to make an Australian Death at a Funeral? Who would we cast? It’d be short though because Australians go for blunt and understated for the most part. And we’d have to make Qantas ad long shots so we can make it a tourism worthy film like Lord of the Rings for New Zealand.

    • cledbo said

      I would want an Aussie Death at a Funeral to be at least as hilarious as Gettin’ Square to pass muster. And given that, Diver Dan must be in it. That’s David Wenham for those of you who don’t know. Shame on you! Seachange was funny, and Sigrid Thornton looks like my mum.

    • campbelld said

      Aussie-Steven Curry as the main son
      Dave Wenham as the wealthy, successful son.
      Damn.
      I’ll come up with a proper cast list.

  15. cledbo said

    I want to see about half of these movies. And would have seen them regardless of how many throwing up Kristen Stewart heads were assigned to them

    Kick Ass looks so good it gets the rare priviledge of me using my free movie tickets I got last year for being awesome at work. Yeah, budget I know.

    I have never heard of Macgruber, but when I saw the poster I immediately thought Supertroopers, then Richard Dean Anderson, and then TAKE MY MONEY SNL, TAKE IT!! It looks good and I don’t even know what it’s about.

    • AmyAlmost said

      Free movies are the best kind of movies. I saw Beneath Hill 60 the other night, with a Q&A with two actors afterwards and they gave food and wine/beer to us. Obviously, it was a great movie. Actually you know, I’m not a war movie person but I did really enjoy it.

      Macgrbuer ‘The funniest SNL film since Waynes World’ that is a big thing to call. I mean whoever said that – did they not watch A Night at the Roxbury? or The Ladies Man? Classics.

  16. aneira said

    i will see kick ass becuase aaron johnson is in it and hes a babe. same dude who plays john lennon in nowhere boy.
    death at a funeral is already a movie. a british movie that came out maybe two years ago and is now somehow a black movie? i dunno about that one..
    ive never seen iron man soo maybe ill watch rent it when iron man 2 comes out and have a movie marathon. (non-sweaty, of course) ohh how i love movie marathons.
    and macgruber could be amazingly funny or absolutley terrible. i really hope its good.

  17. You mentioned Nic Cage, so I’m going to pretend this is remotely relevant. I meant to post it earlier but forgot, because I have the mental capacity of a hamster.

    Anyway, please enjoy this glorious display of Nic Cage’s fine work in the “Best of Wicker Man” montage. It’s best if you never saw the movie or don’t remember it… Points if you don’t piss yourself at the parts involving the bear costume.

  18. kt said

    Death at a funeral is a remake of a british comedy that only came out three years ago. and it has the same little person in it. How can you remake a new movie with the same cast!?! its ridiculous. i refuse to see it on principle.

    I cant wait to see Kick-Ass. I almost died after watching the red band hit girl trailer a few weeks ago. It will be hilarious I’m sure.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: