What Am I Doing On This Wednesday? DIVERSIFYING!

June 29, 2011

Wednesday is generally my no post or short post day.

I am thoroughly open to GUEST POSTS, but for that I would need someone to step forward and GUEST POST.

As for tomorrow! I’m going to start my look at next month’s (July if you’re drunk and don’t know what month it is) movies. It will be a 2 parter and will end on Friday. So look forward to that… I know I am. I love movies… YES I DO… I love movies… EVEN IF THEY STINK LIKE POO POO.

Nevertheless, today I’m really too busy to post because my brain is being used two fold:

1. I’m watching President Barack Obama’s news conference.

2. I’m skimming through Zimbio.com’s gallery entitled “Hollywood’s Interconnected Love Lives”.

High brow… Lowest brow.

To start, Lindsay Lohan and Hillary Duff dated Aaron Carter when they were all underage… Hillary Duff then dated Joel Madden from Good Charlotte who then got together with Nicole Richie. Meanwhile Richie was with the late DJ AM who also at one time dated Mandy Moore “on and off” for almost 2 years. What?! Nothing against Mandy… actually everything against Mandy Moore – you dated DJ AM for almost 2 years? What the eff? But even better…

You may all remember this. I CERTAINLY DO. Wilmer Valderrama dated Mandy Moore and Lindsay Lohan… and I believe they were both BARELY LEGAL at those times. Tip of the hat to Wilmer on that. Also, there are rumors of him dating co-star Mila Kunis when they were on That 70’s Show and she was also quite young at that time too. Bully for Wilmer for not being in jail. But come on! Lindsay? Lindsay dating anyone is basically acceptable because we all think she is drunk and/or high on drugs at all times. But again? MANDY? Why the hell is Mandy dating these dudes?!

Anyway, I think the President handled a question on Libya amazingly well.

At first, Barack talked about how the operation has not resulted in any casualties on our side. There has been limited involvement by our troops. And pointed out how Gadhafi had been one of the main evils out there for years and he was now threatening to massacre his own people and it is crazy surprising to hear Republicans all of a sudden against removing this man from power or stopping a massacre. I enjoyed it. I think the Libya situation has been handled beautifully in my own opinion. This was a good time to step in. There is a chance to reshape the Northern coast of Africa from dictatorships to hopefully some type of democracy. That’s great. At the same time, in our 24 hour news cycle when the hottest issue at the time was the Libyan people and their potential massacre, I think the US had to step in and do something. Twitter, Facebook, and Youtube cannot be flooded with videos of mercenaries snipers killing Libyan people in the streets and CNN is talking about it all day every day – the US has to step in and do something about that.

The Libyan situation makes as much sense as Jake Gyllenhaal’s love life. Jake was hitting that Reese Witherspoon for awhile. She’s a good looking woman and who hasn’t had a crush on Reese at some point in time from one of her rom-coms. I mean I’ve seen “Cruel Intentions” and who didn’t want to bang her in that movie? Same goes for “Legally Blonde” or “Sweet Home Alabama”. So, she’s a good looking woman, but you’re also getting the chance to time-travel sex someone which doesn’t happen often. Then Jake takes a few weeks and gets to humpin’ America’s new sweetheart Taylor Swift. Now, Jake is apparently getting diz-own with Olivia Wilde. So basically this is a story of Jew boy done good… by his schmekel.

Joe Jonas looks like a creep. I’ve never really looked at the Jonas brothers or listened to their music. Nevertheless, Joe Jonas has supposedly bedded Taylor Swift, Ashley Greene, Demi Lovato, and Camilla Belle. That depresses me. It depresses me more than the economy depresses me. Does Joe Jonas always look this creepy? Is this what these chicks want? I get that he is famous and a musician and such, but his music as far as I know it’s kid’s music. Eh, whatever… it’s not like these chicks are using my logic when having sex with men. If they did then they would all be pining over Sven Ole Thorsen or they’d all go lesbian for each other. How much of a better picture would it make if Joe Jonas wasn’t in it at all? Taylor Swift and Ashley Greene as lezzies?! UNREAL. That would be too good to be true and sadly the truth is Joe Jonas.

The President is wrapping up it sounds like…

HE’S TALKING ABOUT THE FUTURE!

Anytime the President talks about the future, talks about the future longingly like a Normal Rockwell painting, that is when you know he is wrapping up. I wish I was as polished a speaker as President Obama. I wish every time I was wrapping up a conversation with anyone that I knew how to segue that lost topic of conversation, that last thought, into a hyperbolic and heart warming look into the future with somber undertones and pragmatism overtones. I wish I could do that.

I wish I could that the next time the President speaks I’m looking at a Zimbio gallery full of Hollywood’s Eskimo brothers and sisters and it makes sense to me. I wish that the President was talking about the successful withdrawal of our troops in Afghanistan. A withdrawal where we know we accomplished much and we still have tough times ahead in the region, but we are prepared to handle them now with what we set in place and how we helped train the Afghan people to answer their own problems. I hope that there isn’t another gorgeous young lady dating John Mayer that makes me want to tear my eyes out. I hope that. I hope that I don’t have to see two beautiful ladies that run through my dreams on either side of some douchebag actor or shitty musician. I hope that when I scan through these pictures that they make sense to me and that some will even inspire confidence in me about this future generation. I hope the gallery makes no mention of Kevin Connolly. If a woman, any woman, put forth a list describing the man she would to date or simply to have inside her on an occasion – at no point would there be a section of that list that would illustrate a ginger headed half man who has no talent to speak of. But if you dare name a beautiful young lass who has been famous in the past 20 years, there is about 1 in 5 chance that Connolly has slept with them. So, I am looking to a future where women will stop making that mistake. Where they will choose better, where they will maybe choose each other instead and then film it for the world to see. A world that hopefully will be a step closer to fixing the economy, a step closer to making us safer from terrorism and a step closer to making “pizza fried rice” a reality and not just a dream.

Thank you…

God bless.

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One Response to “What Am I Doing On This Wednesday? DIVERSIFYING!”

  1. PWG said

    I feel curiously uplifted after today’s post. Motivated to vote, or something. Maybe a little envious of how shiny everyone’s hair is in Hollywood. It’s 95 degrees here and my air conditioner is broken so I’ve lost the will to live and/or snark.

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