I hope Kanye West has an extra bedroom or we’re bunking together in his bed – CHICAGO!

September 6, 2011

Not that I’ve made any mention of this before, but tomorrow I’m flying to Chicago.

I will be in said city from tomorrow around 1-ish to Monday around noon-ish. Yeah, I’ll be in Chicago from tomorrow to Monday for a wedding. My buddy is getting married and that’s Saturday as for the rest of the time, I imagine I’ll be intoxicated and walking the streets yelling things like “KANYE!”, “Where the fuck is Kanye at?!”, “Gold diggers! I’m talking about gold diggers! They don’t want no broke… broke! Am I right?! Like the radio edit version!” or possibly “Where’s Kristen Cavallari at?! Oh right, Jay ‘Layin’ in the Cut’ Cutler dumper her ass after proposing to her and meeting her months earlier!” … or just “FOOTBALL!”

Anyway, that’s what I’m up to.

I’m also zapped right now and by zapped I mean I feel like my energy from all parts of my body have been depleted. I stupidly signed up to right about 6 UFC fighters for fights that take place on September 17th. Articles for fights usually need to be in the week before. So… over the past 24 hours I’ve written 5 articles and my brain feels like poop. In two hours, hopefully I’ll be interviewing the 6th and final fighter of these interviews. We were supposed to talk on Friday, but he cancelled, so now I need to interview him today, so I can write about him while in Chicago (Wed/Thurs morning).

Also, I haven’t packed yet. Why bother, right? It’s not like the flight is less than 24 hours from now.

What else could I do?

Well, I could arrange for myself to go to a Broadway play this evening in New York City, which eliminates the entire rest of my day of driving into the city, seeing the two and half hour play “The Book of Mormon” and driving out of the city. Oh sweet Jesus, why do I do this to myself?

When it rains it pours, am I right? Oh, yeah and it is POURING outside. Sweet. Thanks. Sure. You’re welcome.

By the by, if I put any thought into this at all, there are UFC fights the following week on the 25th, so I could have simply geared the majority of my articles to be on that card and I would have had an entire extra week. Oh, but I’m a stupid head and didn’t think of that. I did pick one guy on that card. So, I will have to write his article, but it probably won’t be written in a foreign city to me and my tiny New Jersey shore based community.

On top of that….

MOTHER FUCKING!!!! FOOTBALL!!!!

FOOOOOOOOOOOOTTTTTTT!!!!! BAAAALLLLLL!!!!

I fucking love football.

Love it.

That shit starts THURSDAY. The Green Bay Packers vs. the New Orleans Saints. I’m not one for making predictions, but I bet those bitches are going to be putting the ball up in the air for everyone to see and scoring some of those beautiful TDs. I LOVE IT!!!! FUCKING SLING IT, YOU BASTARDS! SLING IT!!!

That’s another thing I’ll be yelling around Chicago – “SLING IT!”

Then… then… then… SUNDAY!!!! Sunday starts the madness. I will, of course, be rooting for the Black and Gold of the Steelers from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania of America. I love it. The Steelers will begin their season in the first of two blood baths with their arch-rivals the Baltimore Ravens. The game is in Baltimore, but I don’t care and I don’t give a fuck. I think the Steelers are taking it. I don’t worry about curses or cockiness, I’ve simply got confidence. Large Benjamin running the O-fense and the holy rollah from American Samoa Troy Polamalu running the D-fense. I’m excited. Can you tell I’m excited? Oh sweet and merciful and lavender smelling baby Jesus, I’m excited!

Outside of all that…

I saw Attack the Block this weekend and I enjoyed it. It’s a lot more adult than I was expecting. It’s more action movie than anything. Actually, that’s incorrect. It’s actually one of the most thought provoking mysteries I’ve ever watched because you will be trying to figure out the whole time WHAT IN THE FUCK ARE THEY SAYING?! It’s a mix of heavy accents, speedy talk and most of all just an ass backwards amount of slang. Nevertheless, it’s good.

I also saw Our Idiot Brother, which was great. Simply a solid movie. I was surprised how much I was laughing. Paul Rudd is simply great as Ned. It’s just a great character with a fun movie attached.

So… yeah and stuff.

What are you people up to?

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4 Responses to “I hope Kanye West has an extra bedroom or we’re bunking together in his bed – CHICAGO!”

  1. tiffanized said

    I too am looking forward to football season. It gives me a reason to be in bars on Thursday & Monday nights and also all day Sunday. I’m in a fantasy league too. Draft is tomorrow night at like midnight. Tips are welcome*.

    I officially become old enough to be president of the US on Saturday. I used to give a shit about my birthday but I don’t anymore. I attribute this lack of shit-giving directly to the decline in the number of parties being thrown for me.

    I hear they don’t put ketchup on their hot dogs in Chicago. I can’t imagine having fun in such a locale.

    Good luck on your last article. I really want to know who you interviewed and if I know of them. Will you be able to link to the articles?

    • kristenstewartwantsit said

      I usually post my UFC articles on my Facebook – which you and I are friends on – and I forget to post them here because I’m too busy wondering why Chris Evans/Captain America looks like a patriotic BDSM gimp in all these new Avengers set pictures.

  2. tiffanized said

    Sometimes I feel like all the other common taters got together for a comment strike and I was left out.

    • I was just busy yesterday, and I think PWG has some new punk kid for a boss giving her headaches… So, no worries! You’re still part of The Cool Kids Club, a.k.a. The Still Looking For A Way To Kill Time With Insane Ramblings Club, a.k.a. The Literally Impossible To Offend Club. We haven’t kicked you out or anything. Congratulations!

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