Lebron James Played His Dick Off Last Night… How you doing?

June 8, 2012

Happy Friday to one and all and all but no one…

I am in the process of writing one of the UFC articles for all the monies, so I’m trying to stay focused on that, but I did want to add a post today that most of my general Kristen Stewart readers probably couldn’t give a flying fuck about, but should because physical achievement under absurd scrutiny is something wonderful.

Also, what the fuck else was on last night that could even hold a candle to the Heat/Celtics? Duets? Were you too busy watching Duets to watch Lebron James play his dick off… AGAIN?

Last night, Lebron did this…

Wooooooo! That’s a lot of duckets. Am I right?!

Lebron scored 45 points with 15 fucking rebounds and 5 assists.

30 of those points were in the first half when it was pretty much James versus the Celtics.

I think the most impressive feature of this dick playing off performance was it was nearly all shooting. It was pinpoint shooting. I wish Lebron did pressure inside more (that’s what she said), but he has developed over the years into a light’s out shooter when he has to be.

Last night, that man played his dick off. He played it off more than he had been playing it off previously as he is averaging 30 points a game at this point.

Somehow through the magic of Gatorade and generous helpings of bath salts, Lebron as well as other athletes are able to regrow their dick like a chameleon tail, so they have another dick to play off in the next playoff game.

It’s absolutely wonderful.

The next game between the Heat and Celtics is in Miami and it’s on Saturday night. Lebron helped his team get that Saturday night game 7 at home, so let’s see if it matters in the end. Either way, the dude played his dick off on Thursday.

What else?

I’m going to see Prometheus this weekend.

I’m super excited for it. I think it will be very similar to the original, but slicker and quicker and ultimately not as good. We’ll see. It looks good though. The original is a defining film and this looks like an actual enjoyable experience like a nice cut of meat to gnaw on instead of cotton candy bullshit like The Avengers.

Outside of that, tonight there are fights on for free on FX and Fuel (if you have that). You should have FX though and there are professional cage fights that are on that should be entertaining as Hell.

If you want to jump in on the ground floor and learn about at least two of the guys fighting…

Mike Pyle – http://www.ufc.com/news/At-36-Mike-Pyle-is-Aging-Like-a-Fine-Wine

and…

Ian McCall – http://www.ufc.com/news/Ian-McCall-An-Uncle-Creepy-You-Can-Love

Ian is in the main event tonight against Demetrious Johnson. They weigh 125 pounds and fight like they’re made out of electricity. It’s great.

I hope you have a wonderful weekend.

I hope you ejaculate all over someone this weekend.

That’s my wish for you. And I don’t even ask anything in return. I never see you hoping or wishing stuff like that for me, but here I am tirelessly hoping and wishing at my altar of Arnold Schwarzenegger “Predator” DVDs and expired anal lube that you … yes, you … get sleazy this weekend, so sayeth the Lordess Ke$ha.

I love you?

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