NFL Cheerleaders Shake Their Ass For The Love Of The Game

I went to the Jets/Texans game last night.

First, I am not a Jets fan. But I’m not a Texans fan either. Also, you could get yourself in a fist fight or fatal stabbing or fatal shootout if you wear the opposing team’s jersey. Either way, I was wearing a Tim Tebow t-shirt hoping to start a lot of “TE-BOW!” chants to help subvert from within.

Second, that game was too close for my comfort. I don’t want to see the Jets win. But I really don’t want to see the Jets win after I’ve been fake cheering for them all game and am wearing a Jets t-shirt designed to look like a Tebow jersey. The Texans had some great moments, but that was it. That was a very intellectually low game by Texans’ QB Matt Schaub. He got away with a lot of garbage decisions. He was intercepted once, but it should’ve been more. And, the Jets offense stinks, and Mark Sanchez stinks.

Third, Mark Sanchez is apart of the problem. I used to defend Sanchez because there are so many problems on the Jets that the Jets need to fix that harping on Sanchez is just ignorant. Now, times haven’t changed too much. There are so many problems with how the Jets play football, but one of those problems is Mark Sanchez. He cannot get away without some of the blame anymore by the smart fans. Sure the dumb ones call for his head immediately, but if you’re watching him do some of the shit he does then you cannot let him slide for it anymore. He threw a couple nice balls yesterday and also threw a ton of shitty ones. Sure he has back-up wide receivers and all that, but this is his job to do well. Other QBs have played with back-ups, other QBs have played with teetering offensive lines, other QBs have played without a solid run game and on and on. Mark’s not the biggest problem, but he’s a problem too.

Anyway…

During the game, we were watching one of the many performances by the New York Jets Flight Crew…

The Flight Crew are the cheerleaders, obviously, for the J-E-T-S.

There are 30-40 beautiful women in this Flight Crew dressed in hooker boots, bikini bottoms, a two inch piece of cloth around the bikini bottoms pretending to be a skirt, and pretty much a bikini top.

First, I saw people wearing wool mittens, wool knit hats, sweatshirts, brought blankets, so and so forth. These women are prancing around more than half naked in the same temperature that a wool hat and multiple layers would seem normal in. That’s crazy.

Second, I made a joke that the Jets probably don’t need 40 cheerleaders when they have no running back. They could probably cut the salaries of the cheerleaders and get some need blood at running back. We laughed. But then we were thinking about how much do these women actually make.

I thought that they had to make a few thousand dollars for this. There are 8 home games and they have dance routines they have to practice and they have to stand out there the whole time in those bikinis in New Jersey in October, November, December and in those later months the outfits do not get much more clothier.

The guy I was talking to said he thought they made less than what I said, but he was of the same mind set.

Then Brew Dawgz shows up from getting himself a beer and a sausage and peppers sandwich. We ask him the question and he says flat out that he thinks these beautiful dancing ladies make $80 a game. ! What! ?! ?!

You’re telling me that this chesty little lady with the dimples and big brown eyes is shaking that ass of hers in this cold October night for $80?! For the Jets?! This cannot be.

So, we had to look it up on the internet. After clicking on a few articles about this exact subject, we find out that Brew Dawgz is wrong because Brew Dawgz is hypothetically paying these pretty dancing things MORE MONEY THAN THEY ACTUALLY MAKE.

BOOM!

$50 – $75 a game.

BADA! BOOM!

Unbelievable! We were floored. Utterly floored.

Brew Dawgz was happy he was right because even he thought he was underselling them for a moment, but the internet says in several places that $50 – $75 a game is what they’re paid. I couldn’t believe it. That’s insane! There is no way these girls are not putting in more than $50 worth of effort. The bikinis and such alone plus having to memorize dance routines. Dance routines for a BILLION DOLLAR ORGANIZATION! And they’re paid $50.

Sure, these girls can find other money through some public appearances and the yearly cheerleader calendar, but how much money could that possibly be. If they’re making $50 for 4 hours worth of work then a photoshoot or a public appearance can’t be much different than that. Craziness. We had so many questions about this NFL cheerleading.

First, why not be a stripper or a nude model or at least some type of sexy maybe non-nude modeling? It has to pay better than 4 hours by a football field in a bikini for $50 plus learning dance routines.

Second, is this a resume builder? That’s what we settled on. That this looks good to be on the “Flight Crew” or where ever on your resume. But for what? What’s the next thing that this resume will get you too?

Third, they fucking love the Jets so much they are willing to shake their ass in a bikini for four hours and do a dance routine every 20 minutes or so because they just fucking love the Jets and they’re hot and this is how they show their appreciation.

Fourth, they want to fuck a Jet. That became our second most reached conclusion. Resume builder, get to fuck a professional football player. You may be into football players, and you may be into getting impregnated by football players. No judgments here.

Fifth, why doesn’t every football team have a roster of 40 hot chicks dancing in bikinis?! I am a Steelers fan and the Steelers don’t have cheerleaders. Nor do the Giants or half the teams in the NFL I believe or less than half. But there are teams that don’t have cheerleaders. Sure it could be some moral idea about not needing 7/8’s naked girls dancing around on your field during timeouts because honestly it makes no sense. NFL cheerleaders do not lead the fans in cheers like a college or high school cheerleaders might. NFL cheerleaders are dancers that we just marvel at. Either/or, the reason I think the Giants and the Steelers don’t have cheerleaders is that no one has clued them in that they’re basically working for free.

$50… no transportation… probably free parking… a meal from the stadium? maybe not… and you have to supply them with hooker boots and bikinis. That’s pretty much it.

But what you get in return is this…

I don’t even know why Americans love a kickline of beautiful long legged women just kicking, but we do.

And as terribly as the Jets play, the Flight Crew only gets better and better.

C’mon, Woody Johnson! Give these chicks a raise!