THREE TIME-WASTING THURSDAY THINGAMAJIGS!!!!!!!

April 11, 2013

Hellooooo…

FIRST

Hey, it’s a movie I actually want to see!!!!

“Elysium” is the follow-up film from the director of “District 9”.

If you saw “District 9”, you probably loved it. Most people did who took the time. “Elysium” looks like a perfect second act for director Neil Blomkamp because it looks a lot like “District 9” but bigger and more badass and more Hollywood-y.

“District 9” was about a slum in South Africa where an alien space station settled over it and aliens came down and lived in the poverty stricken ghetto… and then human vs. alien war broke out – more or less. In “Elysium”, South Africa is played by the entire Earth, which is now some post-apocalyptic graveyard that the majority of human civilization scrounges around. As for the space station that is hovering just outside of Earth’s reach, it’s name is “Elysium” and that is where all hot women in bikinis are who can have a body scanner remove cancer from them in a swipe of a magic wand and Jodie Foster is up there with pixie cut and her wonderful shapely calves.

In “District 9”, one alien was trying to figure out a way to get back to the space station to power it back up and leave because they’re all dying on Earth. In “Elysium”, one bad ass looking Matt Damon in a bolted-on mech suit is going to break into “Elysium” for a similar reason of humanity dying on Earth and wreck shit and by shit I mean robots.

Also, Sharito Copley the star of “District 9” is in “Elyium” as well rocking one of those mech suits and if you notice in one bit – he has a futuristic katana! So, I want to see that. I want to see a dude in a mech suit wielding a sword. That’s pretty much my heaven. That and those ripples that are made when a chick with a nice set of boobs is wearing a tank top and those stretchy ripples happen… that’s heaven too. Perv heaven, but heaven nonetheless.

SECOND

The band is Alt J and the song is “Breezeblocks” and the video is fucked up and amazing.

I love the song just as much. I’ve been listening to it almost on a loop. I’ve listened to their album “An Awesome Wave” from last year a couple times too and it’s great. Although, this is still my favorite song on it. Interesting band.

God bless the internet and Youtube for continuing the art of the music video. Fuck MTV for turning their back on it, but thankfully there are still amazing music videos put out on the regular on the interwebs.

THIRD

Just someone BLOWING MY FUCKING MIND.

Pretty much everyone I know who has watched this has said how nervous this made them and panic-y. I fucking agree and I fucking love it. Watching this person play Snake from beginning to kill screen is more thrilling and dramatic and emotion inducing than almost any movie ever made.

If a thriller and/or an action movie is supposed to make you feel panic and nervous and worried and hold your attention and all that than this gif alone is better than 99% of all action-thriller movies ever made. And this is a game that can be played on a calculator.

That’s what I got.

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3 Responses to “THREE TIME-WASTING THURSDAY THINGAMAJIGS!!!!!!!”

  1. tiffanized said

    Liking the alt-J. ∆.

    Fourth time waster: watching me do the Ugly Dance. You get to control my “hind legs” and “front legs”, also the appendages formerly known as my arms.

    Fourth-and-a-halfth time waster: creating one’s own Ugly Dance with your own face or maybe Nicolas Cage.

    • kristenstewartwantsit said

      Maybe it’s because your hands are fists, but I’m surprised there isn’t a clap option.

      I find myself in real life awkwardly doing the “disco” with my feet, keeping beat with a clap, and pseudo karaoke singing whatever song is playing whether I like the song or not. I feel like that is all very generic white guy stuff. And is the type of dancing I made fun of my Dad doing for years.

      Although, the “dance” that he did that would get the most flack from me was when he had been good and sweaty from like an hour of dancing, he’d start leaning really far forward with his fast clapping hands and his legs would kick out backwards like a dog throwing dirt over a poop they just finished. Ahhhh… Bar Mitzvah memories.

      • tiffanized said

        My dad likes to keep one foot stationary, then use the other to propel himself around in a circle, sort of like you do when you spin in an office chair only without the office chair.

        For the KSWI Conference 2013: Dancing Dad Competition.

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