When I say, DEION SANDERS IS SO F@#KING FAMOUS…

October 25, 2013

You say, HOW FAMOUS IS HE?!

And then I say, DEION SANDERS IS SO FAMOUS…

HE GIVES PEOPLE A BOBBLEHEAD OF HIMSELF AND THEY’RE HAPPY TO RECEIVE IT!!!!!

It is a good looking bobblehead.

Before I explain that…

HOW IS EVERYONE DOING?! Great, right?!

I’m sure you’re doing great. I’m sure you’re not dealing with an overly-emotional lawyer. I’m sure you’re just having a great day. Like so great, when you look at yourself in the mirror you’re like, “Damn, I’m having a good nipples day.”

That’s 10x better than having a good hair day. If you know your nipples are looking strong that day then you’re in fucking game mode for life.

Back to Mr. “PRIME TIME” Deion Sanders.

I did not like Deion Sanders as an athlete.

I did not like him as a baseball player.

I did not like him as a football player.

Why?

I was a Bo Jackson man.

If you were a Bo Jackson man then you weren’t a Deion Sanders fan. Ok? Ya dig?!

Second, who cares about baseball? Seriously, get over that sport. It’s boring.

Third, Deion didn’t hit anybody in football. Not only did he not hit anyone, but he played a position where you’re supposed to hit people. And he didn’t. Deion was an incredible athlete who somehow played his position of cornerback so well through speed, positioning, timing, and finesse that he never needed to hit anyone. He was faster and more agile than most if not all wide receivers so he would out athlete and outwit them when the ball would come flying their way… that is, if it did come their way because that didn’t happen that often as quarterbacks rarely threw to the receiver that Deion was guarding.

Actually, a lot of teams (all teams?) would running passing plays that would deliberately make Deion run from one side of the field to the other and while he was running the one way, the quarterback would attempt a pass to the side of the field Deion was running away from. Some call it a drag route. So, a wide receiver was simply the decoy for Deion to follow, but with Deion being Deion – that team’s “decoy” was going to be the best receiver they had. So, teams were heading into a game against whomever Deion was playing for with the idea that they couldn’t really throw the ball to their best receiver. Ain’t that some shit? FOOTBALL!

Nevertheless, I was a Rod Woodson man and a Rod Woodson man likes to see a wide receiver’s helmet pop off as Rod Woodson laid the smack down on them. So, Deion was not my thing.

Also, I hated the Dallas Cowboys and Deion played for them for awhile. This is all neither here nor there or other there.

Because…

I LOVE DEION SANDERS ON TELEVISION!

Yep. The man is brilliant on the teevee as an NFL analyst or TV cohost or what have you.

Back to how famous and beloved and so forth Deion is, every Thursday night, the best football player that night from the winning team comes up and sits at the Thursday Night Football desk with the former players like Deion and Deion’s got a present for him.

That present? That fucking bobblehead referencing Deion’s character from a TV commercial.

That’s a fucking famous person.

If you went to Hugh Jackman’s Christmas party – GOD WILLING – and he bought presents for everybody, do you think those presents would be Wolverine action figures?

They could. And they should. But I doubt the Jackman would do that. Nah, he’d get you tickets to see some Broadway play he’s in or his friend is in or he’d knit everyone sweaters or give everyone matching luggage sets. That’s the type of nice shit Hugh Jackman would do.

Also, everyone would get the same thing as to not show favoritism. Also, the nice type of shit the Jackman would do.

Back to Deion… if you’re unfamiliar with the commercial…

I love this commercial.

Deion’s great in it, the character of Leon Sandcastle is exceptional, the girl doing his make-up in the beginning is an internet model and I recognize her, and it birthed bobbleheads that Deion Sanders gives out to other freak men football players like himself each and every Thursday.

I love football.

I love you all.

I have a headache.

I hope you have a great weekend.

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